Morning Thoughts No.3

October 15, 2018

Hi people! It’s been a bit since I’ve been able to write for this blog. Work has required me to in early for the last week and a half and stay for 10 hours a day, so it’s been hard to find time to write. But I’m back! I’ve missed writing, and I’m excited to get back into this. So as I sip my morning tea (I switched up my green and mint tea combo to green and harvest blend tea from Trader Joes, for a more warming and festive drink), here are my morning thoughts for this rainy day.

Thought Bubble #1: Do something.

Unfortunately, I haven’t done much since I’ve been gone that has been significant enough to write about. I’m still trying to create new experiences for myself and try different activities, but its proving to be more difficult than I thought it’d be. So far, being an adult seems to be focused on working too much and stressing over my bank account. This is a lifestyle I never wanted for myself and I am going to be more focused on making every day more interesting and fun.

Thought Bubble #2: “And they were roommates”

Ever since I moved out of my parents house to live on my own, both in college and currently, I’ve come to the decision that I must be very difficult to live with. This is because I don’t like living with people in general. There are only a very few people I’d consider living with, and only two people that I’ve lived with that weren’t family that I’ve gotten along with. The odds seem small that out of all the roommates I’ve had, its their issues and not my own that make me annoyed living with them (or at least a 50/50 fault). Just little things really make me mad for unknown reasons, like spending 40 mins in the kitchen that’s only big enough for one person, or using the bathroom and never spraying Febreze after, or leaving out dirty dishes in the sink when there is a functioning dishwasher. I just get so irritated over tiny things. I know I need to work on myself by trying to focus on being more understanding of the people around me, as well as not having such a short fuse. But I must say, my biggest dream right now is living in my own apartment all by myself. That is the absolute goal right now while living in NYC. That, and being a kinder and more open-minded individual.

Thought Bubble #3: Who, What, When, Where, Why, How?

I feel that I’m meant for more than what I’m doing here, regardless if that’s a little big-headed of me or whatever. I feel like I want more than what I have here, but I’m not sure what that is. I’m not talking about more physical things, but something more than what I have here in NYC. I’m not sure if I want to move someplace completely unfamiliar, like Colorado or Philadelphia, or maybe going back to school and trying to get a Graduate degree. I’m not sure where I belong or what I’m meant to do in this world, but I want to find out and not feel like I’m just getting by and surviving. I want to find my passion and my people and discover more and travel, and I’m scared I won’t be able to do this and will stay mediocre forever. Today’s goal is to look into opportunities in other places, and research what going to grad-school is like.

I hope everyone has a beautiful day today!